The Vamp Prince
by Dark-Seductress-Kittanya
Summary: Have you ever been read the Frog Prince as a child? This is what happens when a friend of mine tried to get the Scoobies to engage in a play. R&R pleaz!


The Vamp Prince!!!!! AUTHOR: LeighFraserDaGreatNPowerful DISCLAIMER: Joss and I have gone out on many lunch dates and we have come to an agreement. I own Spike!!!! No?...I wish. Unfortunately Anya ain't around and I'm not a scorned woman soooo... Joss still owns all.Songs by various artists. SUMMARY: Well how many of you have had the fairy tale 'The Frog Prince' read to them when they were a little kid. Set in medival times. Spuffy fic. Lots of twists. After season 7, no one ever died through the series.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~!!!!ON WITH THE SHOW!!!!*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Once upon a hellmouth...blah,blah,blah. You guys know the drill. Anyway,Princess Buffy of Balmoral had lovely green eyes that shimmer and long blond hair that shimmers sat on a big throne made of velvet that shimmers inside a crystal castle that shimmers. See, she was the heir to the throne and she was looking for a suitor that had an attitude that...you got it, shimmered. At the moment she was listening to Prince Liam 'Angel' McBowwing, or McBoring as she thought. Oh well, he was better than Sir Riley 'I'm so cheesy' Finn.  
  
BUFFY: Wait a second. Why do you hate all my exes?  
  
LEIGH FRASER: I don't hate ALL your exes. Spike was hot, intelligent and strong. More or less perfect. Buuuuuuuuuuuut...I write the script, you act.  
  
BUFFY: But...  
  
LEIGH FRASER: Don't argue with the director.Back to the play.  
  
BUFFY:*Looks at script secretly hidden under the folds in her old princess gown. She turns toward King Giles, her father, beside her.* Father, this is no use. May I go play ball in the courtyard?  
  
GILES:*Pushes glasses up onto his nose and squints at the badly hidden script in his palm.*I can't quite read this...Be careful of Draga...Dragamiuriuse Parker Dragon, dear princess.*Eyebrows raise drastically as he mutters* Bleedin' hand writing of hers.  
  
BUFFY: I know. I can't read the directors sloppy mess.  
  
LEIGH FRASER: I'm right here.  
  
BUFFY: Oh good for you. You don't look so tough. I can take you.  
  
LEIGH FRASER: Back to the script!  
  
BUFFY:*Mutters* But I could take you.*Voice goes back to normal* Yes, Dad. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~  
  
In the courtyard of the crystal castle Princess Buffy toss her silvery blue ball in the air. I know it should've been gold, what being a princess and all but gold was to tacky for Buffy so her sister Princess Dawn kept the golden one. Anyway...  
  
BUFFY:Wait a second! What do you mean gold is to tacky for me?  
  
LEIGH FRASER:*Rolls eyes*It's to tacky for you, get over it.  
  
As I was saying Princess Buffy tossed her silvery blue ball in the air. She sat cross legged, her dress fanned out over the grass next to the well. Now Princess Buffy was a Princess of strength...  
  
BUFFY:Now we're on the same page!  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Keep your comments to yourself.*whacks Buffy upside the head*  
  
BUFFY:Hey! I wasn't in fighting mode.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:I was! Now shut-up before I hit you again.  
  
Now back to the story! Princess Buffy put too much force into one throw and her silvery blue ball flew into a dark cave where the Parker Dragon lived. Princess Buffy being a wimpy...  
  
BUFFY:Hey!  
  
...princess started bawling at the fact of getting hurt to find a stupid ball. That's when a vampire popped out terrifying the Princess.He had bleached hair slicked back and deep blue eyes. He was clad in a black velvet suit.  
  
BUFFY:Oh not you!  
  
SPIKE:What's wrong with me?  
  
LEIGH FRASER:*Mutters*Nothing!  
  
SPIKE:*Hearing Leigh*Nothing huh?*Gives the director this huge sexy smile*  
  
LEIGH FRASER:*Smiles back*  
  
BUFFY:Oh God! The director is flirting with my Ex. Dawn,Giles,Willow,Tara,Anya,Xander,Angel,Cordy,Oz,Riley,Darla,Samantha and Joyce come running over. What snaps Leigh out of it is Xander's comment.  
  
XANDER:It's an evil vampy thrall. He's going to kill us all.Hey, that rhymes.  
  
DAWN:Grow up! Hey, Leigh when do I get a part?  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Soon! Back to your parts and I'll talk to you later Spike-y!  
  
Everyone leaves.  
  
SPIKE:*Winks at Leigh then turns to Buffy*What 'tis the matter, dear princess?  
  
BUFFY:I dropped my favorite silvery blue ball into Parker Dragon's dank cave.  
  
SPIKE:Oh! Really whatever happened to the strong Slayer!  
  
BUFFY:I'm still the Slayer but the stupid director is no fair. Now get my ball before I stake you.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Hey! No evil plans to kill Spike. Back to the script.  
  
SPIKE:Yes mam'  
  
BUFFY:Yes, Oh Mighty director.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Don't get sarcastic with me. We'll break for you two to figure out this mess. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~  
  
Dawn lay in her curtained four poster bed reading a fantasy novel.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Wait a second, Dawnie.  
  
DAWN:What?  
  
LEIGH FRASER:What is that?  
  
DAWN:101.1 X f.m.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:One, they didn't have radio in medival times and two, they didn't listen to rock.  
  
DAWN:Well excuse me but I couldn't get the orchastra into my room. I tried but they just don't fit. Besides they weren't literate then.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Some important people did. You were supposed to be reading. I'm going to see if Buffy and Spike progressed any. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~  
  
BUFFY:You are so a wimp. Scary vamp is afraid of Parker Dragon.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:No teasing the hot vampire.  
  
BUFFY:Under whose authority?  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Under my authority, Princess Dirtbag! Now, Spike, get her friggin' ball.  
  
SPIKE:Yes, Leigh!  
  
BUFFY:*rolls her eyes and muttered* Whipped!  
  
SPIKE:*turns and sticks his tongue out at her*  
  
BUFFY:*mutters* Child-ish much?  
  
So our brave hero Spike...  
  
BUFFY:Brave hero? Since when?  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Shut-up before I shut you up.  
  
BUFFY:OOOOO!!!!Miss ToughGal! I CAN take you.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Don't test me. Now stop interferring before I clobber you.  
  
Now, as I was saying before I was rudely interupted. Our brave hero Spike ran into the cave. A blast of fire came from the cave and a battle was heard when Spike walked out with her freaking ball.  
  
SPIKE:Now, m'lady, you need to return my favour for if you refuse you'll lose this precious ball of yours for a second time.  
  
BUFFY:Whatever shall I return to you for your gentle greatness?  
  
*she snorts*  
  
SPIKE:Marriage!  
  
BUFFY:Ewwwwwwwwwww! No way! That's no fair I didn't read the script ahead of time.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:*rolls her eyes* It was YOUR job to read YOUR lines that are in YOUR script. Back to the play.  
  
BUFFY:Fine, Great Sir!  
  
SPIKE:Tell your family you are to be wed to William T. Bloody.  
  
BUFFY:Now in reality you know this would never happen, don't you?  
  
LEIGH FRASER: I give up! Spike-y you persuade her into a happy ending.  
  
SPIKE:I'll work on it. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~  
  
Sir Riley Finn was wondering through the shimmering crystal castle when, being the stupid moron he is...  
  
RILEY:Hey!  
  
LEIGH FRASER:I only speak the truth, so shut your trap.  
  
Being the stupid moron he is, he ran headlong into Princess Buffy's little sister Samantha.  
  
RILEY:Now, we're talking!  
  
Who shouts bloody murder at him.  
  
RILEY:Hey!  
  
LEIGH FRASER:I write, not you!  
  
SAMANTHA:Well who are you, kind sir?  
  
RILEY:I'd be Sir Riley Finn.  
  
SAMANTHA:Aren't though my lovely sisters suitor.  
  
RILEY:Not anymore. The writer hooked her up with 'William'.  
  
SAMANTHA:Oh! Would you join me tonight at the feast, Sir Riley?  
  
RILEY:A feast? For what?  
  
SAMANTHA:Spike finally convinced Buffy to marry him.  
  
RILEY:Oh! OK! What a sec... ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*~  
  
It was a clear, starry night when William T. Bloody was to marry Princess Buffy of Balmoral.  
  
BUFFY: I still don't agree with this.  
  
LEIGH FRASER:Shut the Hell up. Do I need to gag you?  
  
The wedding was to take place in the courtyard where the two had met.  
  
BUFFY: *mutters*I didn't want to meet him.  
  
LEIGH FRASER: SHUT-UP!*Whacks Buffy with a baseball bat* Take that Princess Drag Queen.  
  
XANDER: Wait! Wouldn't that be Queen Drag Queen? Or... I'm lost!  
  
LEIGH FRASER: YOU'RE ALWAYS LOST! I've been working on this piece of crap for three months, I haven't slept for two weeks straight and I need a COFFEE!  
  
SPIKE: I'll be back.*Slips off stage*  
  
LEIGH FRASER: You're all idiots with NO talent.  
  
Demon pops up behind Leigh and before Buffy can move Leigh pulls out a sword, beheads it and starts yelling again.  
  
LEIGH FRASER: You stupid dead thing, you are bleeding on the PROPS! ARRRRRRGH! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!  
  
A light flashes through the blood and the demon's carcus dissappears. All of a sudden drums start up and a guitar in an eerie post-grunge music. Leigh opens her mouth and starts to Evanescence's 'Tourniquet'  
  
LEIGH FRASER:I tried to kill the pain, But only brought more.  
  
DAWN: BUFFY: SAMANTHA: TARA: ANYA: WILLOW:(So much more)  
  
LEIGH FRASER:I lay dying, And I'm pouring crimson regret, and betrayal.  
  
I'm dying, Praying, Bleeding, Screaming.  
  
Am I too lost to be saved? Am I too lost?  
  
My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation.  
  
Do you remember me; Lost for so long? Will you be on the other side? Or will you forget me?  
  
I'm dying, Praying, Bleeding, Screaming.  
  
Am I too lost to be saved? Am I too lost?  
  
My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation.  
  
DAWN: SAMANTHA: TARA:(Return to me salvation) BUFFY: ANYA: WILLOW:(I want to DIE!)  
  
LEIGH FRASER:My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation. My God! My Tourniquet, Return to me salvation.  
  
My wounds cry for the grave. My soul cries for deliverance. Will I be denied? Christ! Tourniquet! My suicide.  
  
WILLOW: TARA: DAWN:(Return to us salvation) BUFFY: ANYA: SAMANTHA:(Return to us salvation...)  
  
Spike returns with a cup of coffee. When he hears the music he turns to Xander.  
  
SPIKE: What did I miss this time?  
  
XANDER: Just the usual. Demon attacks director, director kills demon, demon sends curse, director starts singing.  
  
SPIKE: Oh! Thanks, mate.  
  
XANDER: No problem.  
  
SPIKE: Here, Leigh. Have a coffee break. There's hot chocolate too.  
  
Anya's eyes light up with glee.  
  
ANYA: Hot chocolate? Where?  
  
SPIKE: Over by that guy. *He points off stage.*  
  
ANYA: WOW! Xander, let's go! *Runs off stage to the man with the hot chocolate.*  
  
LEIGH FRASER: We'll break for ten, then back to the show. We're paying for the stage per hour, you know. That's why our debt went up. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*  
  
Backstage at break. Leigh is sitting on a table, drinking her second cup of coffee and talking with Buffy. Spike is talking with Willow and Tara about ways to improve their spells. Giles is flirting with Joyce. Dawn is talking to Cordy and Anya about shoes. Xander's talking to Riley and Samantha's flirting with Angel. Oz is asking Darla questions about adapting to your inner demon.  
  
SPIKE: My little sister, Paige and older sister, Elizabeth took up Wiccan five years before I died. They died about twelve years later. I used to watch their skills from the windows.  
  
ANGEL: So, that's where you went to everynight.  
  
SPIKE: Buzz off, Peaches and keep making out with Captian Cardboard's wife.  
  
RILEY:WHAT? Sammy?  
  
SAMANTHA: Get over it. He's more interesting then you anyway.  
  
RILEY: You've been talking to Leigh, haven't you?  
  
SAMANTHA: And Buffy, Dawn, Anya and Cordy.  
  
LEIGH: Oh, grow up, Cat breath.  
  
Samantha stared to sing Michelle Branch's, Goodbye to You.  
  
SAMANTHA: Of all the things I've believed in I just want to get it over with Tears form behind my eyes But I do not cry Counting the days that pass me by  
  
I've been searching deep down in my soul Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old Feels like I'm starting all over again The last three years were just pretend And I said,  
  
Goodbye to you Goodbye to everything I thought I knew You were the one I loved The one thing that I tried to hold on to  
  
I still get lost in your eyes And it seems that I can't live a day without you Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away To a place where I am blinded by the light But it's not right  
  
Goodbye to you Goodbye to everything I thought I knew You were the one I loved The one thing that I tried to hold on to  
  
And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time I want what's yours and I want what's mine I want you But I'm not giving in this time  
  
Goodbye to you Goodbye to everything I thought I knew You were the one I loved The one thing that I tried to hold on to (2x)  
  
BUFFY: DAWN: LEIGH: The one thing that I tried to hold on to....  
  
ANYA: WILLOW: TARA: And when the stars fall I will lie awake You're my shooting star  
  
LEIGH: In other words: Get over it. Back to the play, come on. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ~*  
  
A/N: This is only the first chapter. What do you think? R&R, PLEAZ or no second chapter. I want this to go far. 


End file.
